Sunday, February 26, 2012

You Are Finally Here!

After weeks and months of waiting for you Jackson Ray...

You are finally in my arms!!

It feels so perfect to have you in our lives!

You were worth the wait!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Dear Jake,

Dear Jake,

Your Mommy is a complete mess right now. It's the night before you become a big brother and I'm super emotional about this change that is coming to our family. I don't want to leave you tomorrow. I am so excited for you to be a big brother but I feel like I'm not done enjoying you, just you. We have had a special time together, everyday just the two of us. Even on hard days it was still a joy and easy compared to having two little ones. I don't ever want you to feel neglected or jealous. I want you to have my attention, my whole heart. This whole pregnancy I have been experiencing a phenomenon, my heart has been growing, growing to include your little brother. I know the instant he is here with us we won't be able to imagine life without him. But tonight I looked at heart was full of love for you...over the top-tears in my I have thoroughly enjoyed the good and bad of our last 26 months together. You have grown into the cutest little toddler and you have helped me grow into a mother! My heart beats for you Jake. Every decision I make, every breath I take is with you in mind. You have been my life, everything I have, for the past 26 months and it's all about to change. Not change in bad, just simply change and because of that, I am emotional. a way...this time we have had together. But I am so excited for what the future holds. I know at first your little brother won't be much fun and their might be some resentment but eventually you two will be best friends and playmates. You are so sweet and have such a big heart I just know you will be a great big brother! And from one oldest child to another...try not to be too bossy! 

I love you my boy!

Love, Mommy/ our moments together are forever in my heart!

Monday, February 20, 2012

The first fight!!

Yes, it's brothers have had your first fight and one of you isn't even born yet!! 

It was quite the ridiculous scene!! 

Jake and I were laying on the couch...that's were we have been a lot recently. Jake had his head on my tummy and Jack kicked Jakes head...pretty hard too. 

Jakob sat up and said "No Jackson!"...he has never call him Jackson before. 

Then Jake said, "I hit baby Jack...hit, hit, hit!" and you hit my tummy! 

It really hurt and I was so shocked by what had just happened. Jake has never hit before!

So I had to explain that we don't hit, mommy, baby brother or anyone! 

Jake, you quickly apologized to me and baby Jack. It was one of the most shocking and funny things I have ever experienced as a mother...I didn't know babies could fight while in utero. Motherhood is always surprising!

Mommy/ hoping the fighting doesn't continue!!

Almost 40 weeks... we are Jack...if you haven't noticed you are still in inside my tummy!! What are you still doing there? OK, so if you can't tell I'm a little done...don't get me wrong. I absolutely love being pregnant and experiencing all that goes along with that. However you are probably about 10 lbs. now and are so far down. The other night I was having regular braxton every 10 min at 30 seconds each. Then I laid down to go to bed and they stopped...super bummer, I was hoping you had finally decided to come! I know you aren't late yet so I have no reason to be this impatient. However, your Daddy just started a new job and hasn't earned time off yet and doesn't get the benefit of family time off yet. So, his wonderful scheduler gave him four days off in a row...the four days after my due date. So, you really need to come soon. Sadly, if you don't come on your own in the next few days we are going to have to take measures to get you out. I am trying everything I know. Walks, evening prim rose oil capsules, red raspberry leaf tea, stretches...I have a chiropractor appointment scheduled for your due date and a midwife appointment tomorrow. So, we will be talking about other things to do and an induction will be put on the schedule I think. Bummer. I'm pretty down today. I really really want you to come on your own. I really don't want to feel those crazy piton induced contractions. I have no idea what regular contractions feel like...well the big ones. I have read that hormones decrease near the end of pregnancy and can lend a hand in my feeling blue...well lets hope that you are ready. I can't wait to meet you. But, I want you to be ready. I just had my heart set on you arriving naturally and I feel slightly depressed that that might not be how everything goes down. I think I would really love to say that I did it the way I wanted, the tough girl way. How sad that I feel like I have something to prove, when it's all about you. Everything I do needs to be done for our health, our safety. My heart is already so full of love for you and I just can't wait to hold you and see your daddy hold you and have your brother give you a hug...oh my heart is just aching for those moments. Well, no matter what my sweet Jack I will be holding you soon, in whatever way it happens. The important part is that you will be here, adding another piece to our family. (your daddy would say you complete our family but I'm not quite ready to say that yet. We'll see...)

I love you sweet Jack!

Mama/ ready to have sleepless night to feed you and not just because I'm huge!!

Friday, February 17, 2012

Adventures with Grandpa

Hey Jake,
Today you went on your second outdoor adventure with Grandpa. Last week was your first outing, you specifically were looking for free found them of course. This week you were just excited to go exploring! Your Grandpa loves theses times with you. It's time, just the two of you, to hang out! Today you walked our 10 acres of land, down to the end of the street to look at the horses, played with your trike, swing a little and rode in your wagon. 

You also picked these flowers. One is for me and the rest are for you, you said. These are the first of many flowers to come I'm sure. It warms my heart that you think of me when you are hanging out with someone else. 

You were so excited to put your flowers in a vase....I know this isn't a vase but you had little buds and I wanted you to be able to see this cup worked best. You put your flowers in and we put a little bit of water in the bottom. You the vase around with you all over the house...with me freaking out behind you, because you nearly spilled it several times. Then you set it on the ground and as you were telling me you weren't going to spill kicked it over. I was very glad that I only put a few drops of water in. We re-filled the cup and put it up on a weren't too happy about that. 

Anyway, you love your adventures with Grandpa. I am so thankful that you have an awesome Grandpa that loves to hang out with you!! He loves to do things with you and teach you new things. He is a lot of fun...I know...He's my dad!! Enjoy those moments Jake...not every boy is so lucky to have a Grandpa that likes to play with them. We are truly blessed with the family we have!!

Mommy/totally took a shower while you where on your adventure!!  

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

39 Weeks...and a big brother!!

Hey Jackson,
Yesterday your Daddy and I went to the Doctor. We got to see you for the last time before we hold you!! I'm so excited to hold you but it is so fascinating to see you in my tummy. I understand why you are hanging out more than I would like. You look comfy. You had your hands up by your face, maybe even sucking a thumb...your brother never did that. You are face down...Hallelujah and head down of course. They took lots of measurements and guessed your weight to be around 9 lbs. 5 oz. already. Babies usually put on 1/2 a pound each week from here on out. So, I need you to come out! The midwife stripped my membranes...not too painful, I might have her do it again if we make it to our next appointment on Tuesday. I am also going to try and see a Chiropractor this week to see if he can jumpstart some things. If nothing else he can help relieve some back pain. 

Everywhere I go I catch people looking at me and their eyes get huge and I can only imagine what's going through their heads..."Whoa....that ladies huge!!" It's really funny...I get some enjoyment out of it!!

I really would like you to come soon...Not just that I'm huge and done but I would really like to give birth to you naturally. I really want to know what non-medically induced labor feels like, I want to know what it feels like to go into labor...I think it could be great as labor can be! 

So while we are waiting for you here are some pictures of me and your big brother...we finally got some!

Your big brother is a mover and wasn't having this photo shoot at all. 

Your Daddy took these pictures...he did a great job with what was given to him!

 He wasn't such a big fan of standing still...I don't think he realizes that cameras don't capture motion...well they do, in blurs!!

Your big brother loves to lay his head on you and cuddle. 

Yesterday Jake told you to come out and play cars with him. I have a feeling we will spend many hours...the three of us on the floor, playing cars. 

Jake kept saying "Happy Valentines Day!!"

Happy Valentines Day....we love you little brother!! 

So excited to meet you!!

Sharing some love.

Come out baby Jack!!

can't wait to meet you little man!! 

Now I'm going to go do some jumping jacks...haha...get it...

Love, Mommy/ So ready to meet you!

Friday, February 10, 2012

More Pregnancy Pics!

I really can't help it..I love pictures of myself. Ok that's not true, I'm not usually a fan of photos of myself, but it's something I'm trying to work on. I figure for the sake of documentation I should be in some photos and so should your Daddy. But it's also for you boys, I want you to have not only your lives documented but our families life! So, your Daddy took some pictures of me with Jack in my tummy...the ones with Daddy in them Uncle Matt took. I think they turned out great. In fact I was pleasantly surprised when I had more than a few to put up. So here they are!!

Your Mommy is a photographer not a model so...let's just keep that in mind.

I do love when your Daddy takes pictures of smiles look more real. 

I think this one is my favorite...I'm not usually into contemplative for no reason shots but I think this looks nice!

This will be my new Facebook profile photo in a few seconds!

I think I was watching Jake walk down the handrail usage of course!!

still watching...a mama's work is never done!

Love that golden sun!

Your Daddy and Mommy!!

Your Daddy is so silly!! 

Boys, don't ask...

One last cute one...

Oh, your Daddy....he makes us all laugh so much!!

I'm sorry your parents are so weird boys. But, I think you will grow to love it. We love life and we love you so we are bound to have fun along the way!!

Love, Mommy and Daddy!

Oh Boy, 38 weeks...

You are full term little man...that means you can come at any time now and be healthy...usually and hopefully. 

Your sweet Nana threw us a shower this last weekend!! It was so much fun!
Here are a few Pictures!!

Water bottles...because these days I'm drinking a lot of water!!

Paper straws...because they are so cute and fun!

Mustache Cupcake toppers...aren't they the cutest?!?!

My favorite snacks! 

The snack table! So your Nana...bought my favorite candy...bunch a' crunch off the internet in super bulk just for the party...she's the best!!

All the ladies with their mustaches!!!

Thank you to everyone that came and celebrated with us...we love you!!

Even your brother got in on the mustache action!!

*Side note: I do love the little man theme but facial hair runs in the family! Plus your great grandpa Ray, where your middle name comes from had an awesome handlebar I thought it very appropriate that your shower was covered in mustaches. Way to go Nana, you did a fantastic job!! I feel so blessed!!*

In other Pregnancy News: 

I had a doctors appointment yesterday, everything looks good. Your heartbeat is good and strong, you are head down, with your back on my left midwife said that's good, labor tends to be easier with you on that side. You have dropped and I am dilated 1-2cm. So we are on our way little man!! 

On Monday, your Daddy gets to come with me to see you one last time before we meet you! We are so excited to meet you! Your Daddy keeps telling me everyday that he can't wait to meet you! At our Monday appointment I'll have another exam and they might do this thing called stripping membranes. Just the sound of it is painful...It supposedly hurts. So, I'm a little nervous for that. But really what is a little pain in the grand scheme of labor and labor is only a few hours of my life. We can get through it! Temporary pain...lasting joy! 

I can't believe the time is finally arriving. We are going to have a family of 4. In all honesty you could decide to come in March but I'm really hoping for sooner than that. But soon, you will be in our arms. I keep picturing this moment of you meeting your brother and the four of us being together as a family! Oh, my heart just crumbles! Soon!! So very very soon!!

Love, Mama/Can't wait to meet you!!

Jakob's 26 Month Update!

Hey Jake, 
I know that 26 months isn't some huge milestone. But you continue to change on a daily basis. This stage in life is so fun...sometimes crazy frustrating but so fun.

My current favorite quotes of yours:
"Hey Lovey"...this just started today, I said this to you and now you call me lovey too!
"What's making that sound?" whenever you hear a noise
"Oh, I don't know!" you shrug your shoulders when you say this
"Hmmm" with your finger on your lips...thinking
"Why not?" you said this to me after I told you not to do something. Oh NO!!
"follow me!" your no dummy, people listen to you and follow you!
"I love you too!" you don't really say i love you, unprompted but you definitely return an, I love you!
"hold me"this used to be "up" but this tugs at our hearts a little more and I think you know it!
"cuddle me Mama." You don't call me Mama very often but when you say this you do...melt my heart!
"brush all that dinner off" you say this when we are brushing your teeth
"I have poo poo in my bum" You say this when you need to go #2...a little gross but gets the point across
"I want my Daddy back" you tell me this everyday your Daddy is at work
"that's my favorite" you say this about anything that in that very moment might be your favorite

You have started having a lisp with only a few of your TH sounds. It's something I'm keeping an eye on, correcting as needed. I think it's just another step in your speech journey, the sounds are already changing into more proper's just hard to make that 'TH' sound. 

You can count to 5 all by yourself!
You don't enjoy puzzles...the ones where you have to put the piece in the right spot just so, you get frustrated. 
But you love to count! Everything... cars, blocks, trees, rocks, spots on the carpet.

You also know your colors very well. And thanks to a little show called 'Bubble Guppies' you are learning how to mix colors. You know all the standard colors, and even teal, gray, brown, black and white. Way to go! Your favorite color changes but you really like green right now. You also love pink and purple...too funny!

You know the names of more cars than I do. I love to hear you say Lamborghini and Aston Martin!

You are very curious about letters and we are starting to learn them and what sounds they make. You know the ABC song rhythm and tune but only know the letters A-G and L, M, N, O, P of course!

Potty training is not are starting to get it, but being 9 months pregnant and soon to have an infant I don't want to keep you from succeeding. So, soon we will do it, for good. Get rid of those diapers, let you have accidents and learn to go in the potty. Right now you use going to the potty as a stalling technique for nap and bed times. Oh buddy, you are too smart! You knew I wanted you to go potty, so you would come out of your room say you needed to go then proceed to take 15 to 20 minuets to even attempt going. You would sing songs and read books. So, I had to change up my strategy. Now, we try before nap time and if you do have to go during nap there is no singing or reading. Just potty. It has helped. We'll see. 

You love when your Daddy comes home from work. You love getting to see him in the mornings and saying goodbye. During the day you will ask me, "Where Daddy at?" And I'll tell you at work and your usual reply is..."Oh, I want my Daddy come home!" It's so sweet. You have 'punished' your Daddy a few times after he has been gone all day. As he's walking up the stairs you get excited and as soon as you see him you run away and don't want to see him.

You have started to experience more fear. You wait at the top of the stairs because you are afraid of falling. You are petrified of sitting on your daddy's shoulders for some reason. He has never dropped you, nor would he ever but for some reason the sensation of falling backward is too great. You clawed up his face a few weeks ago because you were so sure you were falling. Poor Daddy, it looked like a cat attacked his face. I know you will get over it, it's just a development thing. I'm glad that you are starting to fear falling. For a while I had to watch you like crazy because you would just dive off of things.

You are a good boy... a really good boy. Only a few fits here and there. We do time out's with a calm down glitter jar. They work really well for you. You don't even get one time out per day, you are really good. You are a very smart boy and we talk things out. I explain to you what you did that was wrong, you say sorry and we go on our way. When we tell you to do something we have you say, "ok Mommy" or "ok Daddy", we feel that having you acknowledge what we said means no misunderstanding. So, when you do what we just told you not to, you knew you weren't supposed to do it. Laying out clear rules and boundaries has helped cut down in fit throwing. You know what is expected of you! This technique might work for your brother, but we might have to change up or strategy...we'll see how it goes.

You love to run around. You race around your room, the kitchen island anywhere there is room, you run! You say "1, 2, 3, Go, Go, Go!!!" or "on your mark...GO!!" it's really cute to watch

You love to sing. We sing songs at nap time...I try to pick calming ones but you always want wheels on the bus or head, shoulders, knees and toes. You make up your own songs about what's happening around you. You sing about who you are with and what you are doing, it's the cutest thing I have ever heard!

You still love to play with cars, you also love to play with your train set and kitchen. I love that you can get to all your toys so, if you feel like playing with a certain thing you can get to it...and you know right where to put it back (you do a great job at helping to put your toys away). You love to play with your instruments and read books too!

You are going to be a great big brother...we bought you this baby leopard that makes sounds and you can feed it. We thought it would be good for you to do while Mommy feeds the baby. You love this little leopard!! You named him Jeffery and you carry him around just like a little baby. He makes these whiny cat sounds and you say, "aww Jeffery, it's ok, I hold you!". It really is the cutest thing. You are going to be great with your new brother. I'm sure at times there will be flares of jealousy but I will do my best to spend time with just you and time with both of you. You are so loving and caring and already expressing interest in pushing him in his swing...that sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Here Jack, let me swing you!! HAHA!! I can't wait for the moment you will get to meet him. For the moment when my whole family of four will be together for the first time...Oh my heart is so full just thinking of it...and my eyes are teary...of course!

You are such a joy my boy... you are growing up to be such a nice boy. I am truly blessed to be your Mommy. Your Daddy and I are just so proud of you!! Happy 26 months Buddy!!

Love, Mommy/ I love my cuddle buddy!